How to Plan the Best Bridal Shower: Timeline, Etiquette, Ideas, and More

How to Plan the Best Bridal Shower: Timeline, Etiquette, Ideas, and More

Traditions & Etiquette  

• Who hosts the bridal shower? 

Traditionally, the Maid of Honor would host the bridal shower. At one time it seemed greedy for an immediate family member to host, although now it is perfectly acceptable for any of the bride’s loved ones to host the shower. It is also common for the bride to have several showers with friends, family, or out-of-state relatives.  

• Who pays? 

Generally, it is the host who pays, but we see a lot of split bill showers too. Dividing the cost between family members or the wedding party is often seen during modern times. 

• Should the bride be involved in the planning process? 

Yes! Unless the bride says, “Just surprise me!” you can automatically assume she wants to be part of the planning process. Let her decide how involved she wants to be. 

• Who gets an invitation? 

The general rule is, if they are invited to the wedding then they can be invited to the shower.  

• What time of day is best for a bridal shower? 

Traditionally, bridal showers are hosted during the mid-day hours in the late morning or early afternoon. An event that lasts 2-4 hours is standard depending on location and activities. Make sure you include time to decorate and clean up when you book the venue.  

• Where should the shower be held?  

Most bridal showers are hosted at home or the backyard, but over the years we have started seeing more showers held at event venues, wineries, restaurants, and some even host destination showers.  

• Should I bring a gift?  

Proper wedding gift etiquette states you should bring a gift to the bridal shower and the wedding. Does this mean they have to be of equal value? Nope. Some like to gift the bride something small for herself at the bridal shower, and then follow with a larger gift for the couple at the wedding. If you are unsure of what to bring for a gift, you can always check their wedding registry. No matter what, the wedding couple will be happy you just gifted them with your presence.  

• Is this a women-only event?  

Traditionally, this was a ladies-only event. However, this is the 21st century and we make our own rules! Jack and Jill’s showers are becoming increasingly popular, and it is perfectly OK to invite your close guy friends to your shower. Sometimes the groom or father of the bride will make an appearance towards the end to thank everyone for their warm wishes and gifts.  

Planning Timeline 

3 months before  

• Communicate with the bride about how involved she wants to be, and what vision she has for her shower 
• Create a guest list
• Establish a budget 
• Pick a date and time 
• Find and book the venue  
• Send a save the date email to the guests 
• Order invitations 
• Book any other vendors you might need (florist, caterer, photographer, entertainment, etc.)  
• Start delegating jobs  

2 months before 

• Decide on décor and shop for needed items 
• Start any DIY projects you may have
• Plan the menu 
• Make a backup plan if you are having the event outdoors in case of poor weather  

1 month before  

• Send invitations to guests 
• Purchase favors and gifts
• Finalize games and entertainment 
• Create a timeline to ensure a smooth event 
• Finalize plans with vendors 
• A delegate who will help set up and clean up  

2 weeks before 

• Organize RSVP’s 
• Make shopping lists for food, drinks, plates, cups, etc.  
• Create an upbeat playlist  
• Confirm with the venue and vendors 
• Finalize your layout for your event space  
• Pick your outfit  

1 week before 

• Do any last-minute shopping  
• Charge cameras and technology 
• Purchase alcohol and drinks  
• Assemble & bag the favors for guests 
• Wrap any gifts  
• Make any last-minute packing lists 

1 day before  

• Pick up flowers, balloons, dessert, cake, and food 
• Prepare food that can be made ahead 
• Start decorating if you can  
• Make sure the house is clean (if you are hosting at home) 
• Check bathrooms (stock up with hygienic supplies)   
• Confirm with any family or bridal party members who are helping 
• Check the weather and prepare for any backup plans  
• Make sure you have an “emergency kit” scissors, tape, notebook, pen, chargers for technology, trash bags, etc.  

Day of  

• Prepare fresh food 
• Buy ice if the venue is not supplying it 
• Decorate 
• Set up drinks and food 
• Take notes of who gave what gifts 
• Take lots of pictures of the bride if you didn’t hire a photographer 
• Have Fun!  

Themes, Entertainment, Food, & Drinks 

Have the bride set an overall tone and vision for her day and go with it. It may be more elegant like a garden themed shower, or a little more detailed such as “Under the Sea” themed. Maybe she just likes boho decorations and does not necessarily need a theme. Try to find a theme that fits your venue space. You may not need a lot of decorations if you are hosting the shower in a vineyard or somewhere outdoors. If you are having your event in a community center room with beige walls and floors, you may want to add more color and decorations. 

Having some sort of food is a must for a bridal shower. Just make sure you are sticking with your budget. We like to plan our menu with the time of day you are having your event. If you are having your event right at lunch hour, you may want to plan for a bigger meal assuming your guests have not eaten. If your event is at 2pm, it is okay to assume your guests have had lunch and it is perfectly fine to serve light snacks and dessert. Some bridal showers have a more formal sit-down meal, and others are filled with more appetizers and finger foods. Charcuterie boards have also become increasingly popular with events, and generally include something for everyone (even those with limited diets). Throwing a pot-luck style event is a great option, and this will also helps keep the budget low as well.  

Always make sure you have plenty of water and non-alcoholic beverages on hand.

If you are planning on serving alcohol, be sure to check with your venue to make sure they allow it. Some venues will require you to buy all the drinks (alcoholic and not) directly from them. Sangria, champagne, mimosas, or fruity cocktails, are all great options to serve at bridal showers.  

One thing we know for sure is if your guests get bored, they will go home early.

It is important to have several different forms of entertainment to keep your guests engaged. Have your guests sign some form of guestbook or make a memory book for the bride. Maybe have every guest bring their favorite recipe to share with the bride or start a date night idea jar for the wedding couple. You could also play classic bridal shower games such as, What’s in your purse? Or the Honey-Do game. If you are having your event at a winery, you could as the venue for a tour of the vineyard or cellar. Some hosts go as far as hiring henna artists, belly dancers, or tarot card readers if you are feeling extra. Renting a photo booth has also become increasingly popular and will keep your guests having fun for hours on end.  

No matter which route you choose for a bridal shower, just make sure to have fun! Keep it light-hearted and remember the day is about the bride and her new journey in life. This is a day she will never forget, and she will always remember how hard you worked to honor her.  

Complete Weddings + Events Des Moines

At Complete Weddings + Events in Des Moines, IA, our team specializes in all types of events, so we understand the amount of work that goes into the planning of an event and we want to make it easier for you! Check out our service pages to learn more about how we can COMPLETE your event!

Complete Weddings + Events, Des Moines’ leading provider of event and wedding photography, videography, day-of coordination, lighting, DJ services,& photo booth rental.