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vow writing tips

Vow Writing Tips from Wedding Experts

9.15.20

The commitment couples vow to make on their wedding day is typically sealed (before the kiss of course) with each individual’s thoughts, hopes, and intentions for the future of their relationship. Traditional vows include the standard “… to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part”, but writing your own personal portion before these (or starting from scratch completely) can mean SO much to your partner, and can help inaugurate the vows in your own heart as well. This is something you do once-in-a-lifetime, and we think a few vow writing tips can help get the words flowing!

Vow Writing Tips from Wedding Experts

Complete Weddings + Events’ wedding experts, each attending over 25 weddings a year (some over double that!), have the advice to help you get started in the vow writing process plus tips on what to include in these declarations of commitment. Get all our vow writing tips from wedding experts below!

A Positive Outlook

Before you begin writing, be sure you try to field any negative thoughts about the process and come at this with a positive outlook. Writing wedding vows can sound like a scary writing project to some, especially for those non-writers or non-emotional types, but try to begin with a smile. Once you’re thinking about how meaningful this will be to your partner, and really what this means for yourself as you make a vow to commit to aligning your future with your partner, we hope the positive thoughts can start flowing! These vows are for one of your most exciting days, so channel that joy you’re hoping to have on your special day, and begin the writing process with happy thoughts!

Decide If Personal Vows Are Right for You

“In wedding ceremonies, one of the focal points are the vows that the couple make to each other in front of witnesses that form a covenant,” Kevin Paladino says. This can be a lot of pressure for some, and writing personal vows, especially speaking personal vows, is not right for everything. If you’re set on writing your own personal wedding vows, one option to relieve some pressure on the big day is to speak your personal vows in private with your partner. This could be after your first look or ideally during a private moment before the ceremony. Whether you’re speaking them at the ceremony, or in private, know that there’s no need for these to be extravagant. Keeping the vows simple maybe your best route for success.

Know Your Audience

While you may be speaking your vows in front of many family and friends, remember that the vows are for your loved one, an audience of one! Complete’s Reed Beldin gives advice saying “When choosing what to vow, remember you are talking to her/him directly, not the 300+ people at your ceremony.”

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